Oh yeah…

That’s why I don’t make stuff for myself. Because it takes for-freaking-ever.

The pineapple skirt is at 40% complete. Round 20 out of 50. One round takes a really long time. And it’s starting to get hot here, so holding a pile o’ Simply Soft in my lap is growing progressively less appealing.

The Barbie Float

When asked about what I am currently crocheting, I answered that I had just finished a Barbie dress.

Fiesta ended last week.  Thursday, Bobbie’s school had a float parade.  All the kids were invited to make floats and, if they had done so, to march in the parade.  Naturally, I learned of this on Monday.  I guess I should count myself lucky it wasn’t Wednesday!

We pulled out a shoebox and my mother helped Bobbie cover it with scrapbooking paper.  While they were working on that, I set to work on the dress.  Using a 3.75 mm hook and some pink sport weight yarn that was laying around, I came up with a strapless gown.  The train starts at the top of the dress and is about half again as long as the dress itself.  Onto this went several flower appliques, each made with a larger hook and/or yarn.  (For instance, I started out with fingering weight yarn and a 3.75 mm hook, then switched to a 4mm hook, then to sport weight yarn with the same hook & so on).  Three days’ of fitful work later, Bobbie had her own Fiesta princess.

barbie-float-small-one1Here’s the finished project (plus a bonus shot of part of my laptop and my comforter, ha-ha).

This is actually not a Barbie, but some random other doll I’ve bought fairly recently.  Honestly, I can’t tell them apart.  I shouldn’t use Barbie for any fashion doll, I know, but it was made by Mattel.  I think it’s actually a Belle doll.

I added the center tie as an afterthought, because I was afraid the train would otherwise be so heavy it would fall down.

You see that she’s sitting on a Barbie couch and practicing her Fiesta wave.  What you don’t see is the fact that I taped the crap out of her to hold her in place.  Her arm that’s behind the couch it taped to it, her legs underneath the gown is taped to it, the train itself is taped down, and the ribbon sash is taped in two different places.

This was made 100% with stash yarn, for which I am very proud.  You know that stash game I was a part of?  Nothing ever became of it.  I’m 99% certain that I won, at least in terms of yardage, but no winner was ever actually declared.  I think I may have teed off some people because I finished off an afghan UFO that had been haunting my closet for years.  Rules of the game allowed us to claim the entire weight of the project.  Since it was worked in double-stranded worsted weight yarn, it weighed over three pounds.  Even with having to subtract 64 points for the yarn I had to buy to finish it, it was worth several hundred points.  I didn’t–and don’t care about an actual prize, but I did want bragging rights.  Well, I won’t bother them again.  (And for the record, I do think that afghan had something to do with the lack of a declared victor because they had no problem declaring a winner in the previous stash game.)

But I digress.  It truly doesn’t matter & I shouldn’t let it bother me.

One more picture.  This is of Bobbie holding her float after school (I did take pictures of the parade, but none of them were particularly good):

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Things I plan to crochet.

This is not the same as my Ravelry queue.  I feel bad for putting things in queue that I’m not going to make almost immediately.  This is, mainly, stuff that I have StumbledUpon and added to my Crafts bookmark subfolder (and not things that I’ve downloaded as .PDFs, either).  In other words, it’s my “someday” cache.

First, my current WIP:

Den-M-Knit Pineapple Skirt or Poncho.  This is a lovely pattern over at Elann.com.  I’m actually mainly working in the .PDF of the chart.  Why?  Well, the skirt has a max waist measurement of 30″.  Which I might have had at around age 12 or 13.  So I am not using the right yarn (I’m using white Caron Simply Soft) or the right hook–I’m using a 6mm instead of 4mm.  Sounds like a huge leap, but it’s not.  I’ve got to get it over my 47″ hips anyway.  I plan on running some i-cord (well, the crocheted version) or ribbon through the waistline.

Seraphina Shawl.  This is in my Ravelry queue, but I really should take it out, because it’s far down my list o’ things to do.  The problems with this pattern are rather legendary.  (That’s why the link takes you not to the original pattern, but to the corrected version on Crochetville.)

Little Fire Crochet Pants.   Somewhere I have some Wool-Ease.  These will go in the box o’ baby gifts to be given that I really should have, rather than my current method of scrambling to make something & hoping the baby hasn’t outgrown it by the time I get it sent.

Bev’s Newborn Baby Jacket.  This isn’t a “someday” pattern; this is a pattern I use so often I know it mostly by heart.  Still, I have it bookmarked in case I forget things, which I inevitably do.  I absolutely love Bev Qualheim.  Her blog is in my daily reading list.

Crochet Chainmail Hood.  One of the mamas on MotheringDotCommune came up with this pattern.  When I saw her thread about it, I didn’t open it for three days because I thought for sure it was a knit pattern.  Imagine my delight when I discovered it wasn’t!

Celestine Crochet. On the one hand, it looks like fun.  On the other, it looks like it would take a while & my kids would squabble over it if I made only one.

Crochet Crown.  I’ve been planning to make this sucker for years.  Seriously, since we lived in Hawaii.  I started it once & frogged it; damned if I remember why!

Bella Bambina’s Sweater Dress.  This is very pretty, but quite frankly I could probably make it without the pattern.  (Just as she could undoubtedly make my Basic Baby Dress without the pattern!)

Kimono Sweater.   Being that there’s not an actual pattern, this should be right up my alley!  And it is, but I foresee making it in cotton yarn, & I simply haven’t enough, nor at the moment the money to buy enough.

Belize Wrap.  I haven’t quite decided whether I actually like it or not.  It intrigues me, but honestly it’s not my style at all.  Maybe I’ll eventually find the perfect recipient & make it as a gift.

Crochet Cami.  One of those things I just haven’t had the time for yet.  The lady who wrote this pattern was 12 at the time!  I could barely crochet in a straight line at that age!

Child’s Snuggie.  I’ll admit it.  I don’t own a TV.  I’ve never seen the Snuggie commercials.  In all likelihood, I will never make this.  It’s just scary, and fascinating.

Cut-Away Cardi.  Incredibly cute–and it can probably be made with Simply Soft.  But in south Texas, there’s already no reason to wear it.

Doral Wristlets.  In all honesty, I still have not figured out the purpose of these sort of things.  And they’d move around like crazy, wouldn’t they?  But they are cute, and look like they’d be a quick project, so they stay in the list.

I LOVE stars.  Now, this is what I should make for the brand new Charlotte Elizabeth H~ J~.  I wonder how much time it would take…

Sugar ‘n Cream Halter.  This is another one I’ve had since Hawaii.  It’s been a goal of mine for a while to make a halter top that actually covers my boobies.   Of course mine are, oh, ten  or so times the size of hers (at least), but she has a template on that page of how she made the cups, and if I can just figure out what goes where, I’m all set.

Mop Top Mascots.  I just came across these tonight.  They will probably get made soon.  They’re cute, and look to be quick to whip up.  In fact, they and the next link are the reasons for this post tonight.

Around the World Baby Cardigan & Hat.  I have a TON of Simply Soft.  I need to make this!  If I make the larger size, Miss Charlotte should be able to wear it when it gets cold again.

(I love it when my friends have kids!)

Do you Stumble?

Assuming you use Firefox (and if not, why not?), and further assuming you have the StumbleUpon app, I have a plea for you:

Any time you come across a good crochet blog or, even better, a good free pattern, Stumble it!  I’ve been surfing through their Knitting/Crochet category, and the bulk of what I’m coming across is knitting.  I gave a thumb up to the Little Fire Crochet Pants from With a Tangled Skein, & actually discovered it for SU!  I’m going to go through her blog and Stumble other crochet patterns, and the whole blog, so Amy if you suddenly start getting a lot more traffic, that’s why.

I love finding new patterns.  Much as Ravelry’s great for that, the random nature of SU really appeals to me.  So, if you have a favorite pattern that you use again & again, please Stumble it so the rest of us can share!

Finished that darned halter top.

It would fit me. Sort of. If I crammed my boobies into it and didn’t mind the fact that you could see my nipples through the thing.

Looks much better on Miss Linda than I could ever hope it to look on me. It’s a wee bit big, granted, but as far as anyone ever has to know, it was meant that way. She loves it, and I don’t have to a) spend the next three months trying to make it work for me or b) frog it like everyone else who’s made the pattern. Yay.

Maybe I should read reviews before starting a pattern the next time!

I am working on the One-Skein Backless Halter from Sensual Crochet. I decided to put it up on Ravelry, ’cause I belatedly remembered that’s what Ravelry’s for.

After doing this, I went & checked out the other two projects for this pattern.  Now, that there are only two projects from a pattern in a book published last year should have been my first warning.  Would have been, had I the intelligence to check it out before starting the pattern.

Both of the other women who’ve made it either have or plan to frog it. Gulp.  From Pyogazel’s notes:

Feb 20th : finished. Used almost 3 skeins. Worn just to takes pictures, wll frog as soon as yarn is needed. Definitely NOT for big boobs, unless you intend to wear it in private let-s-have-fun-with-our-body sessions.

Heh.  Well, I wasn’t intending to wear it out in public.  Not without some heavy modificatons.  Right now I’m planning on, at the least, running a length of I-cord through it horizontally to help creat a shelf bra, and basically not putting ties on it where the pattern says to put ties on it, but whereever it makes more sense to do so.

I’ve also increased my hook size.  I was trying to make it exactly according to pattern, at least as much as I could, but this 3.5mm hook stuff is just not amusing.  It should not take this long for me to make a 16-round square (even accounting for the fact that I’m certain I’ll need more than 16 rounds).  So I’ve switched over to a 3.75 mm hook for my 13th round.  I imagine I’ll need 20-25 rounds.  At least.

I’m quite well-endowed, and plus-sized besides, so it’ll be interesting to see if I can get this pattern to work for my body.  Probably not, but it’s at least been a fun thing to make.  I’m using a yummy bamboo blend yarn (that I don’t recall the brand of, & that of course I lost the label from), so at least it’s a pleasant experience to crochet it.

Oldest UFO in existence–finished!

I call this the “Underway Blanket” because I started it back in 2002 to give my husband something special to keep him warm while he was underway.

Embarrassingly enough, this project outlasted our marriage.

See, folks, this is why I don’t make full-size afghans.  Because it takes me damn near seven years to finish them.  For even more laugh-at-Sabra perspective, I’ve been working on this sucker almost as long as my oldest child has been alive.  Well, OK, not working on it all that time; most of the time it lived in a closet somewhere while I went off and worked on other things.  Things that gave me more immediate gratification.

To show that I’m not completely bitter, I do intend to actually give this thing to Robert now that I’ve finished it up.  Mainly because my mother tried appropriating it before I finished it, and that annoyed the fuck out of me.  (‘Scuse my language.  But you do not cuddle up under someone else’s UFO.)